I started my self-love journey with a broken heart.

by Candace L. Smith

I broke my own heart.

When I began to learn what it takes to properly love yourself, to love me, it broke my heart. It broke my heart to realize that I cared so little for myself that I hadn't set any real boundaries in relationships. It broke my heart to learn that I had neglected to properly show love to me but was trying so desperately to love others.

It was heart breaking.

For me. Self - Love is the show I show to myself. Love is an action word so it then becomes the action that I express towards myself. So what is love? Because I had not examined what love is through how I treated myself I could not start there so I started where I spent the majority of my time and that was: how have I been attempting to love others.

When I love someone I care about their well-being. Well, how had I been caring for my own well-being? The answer to that was I wasn't. I wasn't worried about me being well. I was concerned about appearing to be well.

I was more concerned with caring for others because it took the attention off of areas in my life where I lacked growth. Loving yourself is seeing the damaged areas in your life and valuing you enough to do something about it. To address it. To confess it. To make a plan. Set a goal. And work hard to accomplish it.

This month during this #28daysofselflove I've decided to create a wellness plan to address different areas of my life: my physical health issues, mental health, spiritual life, business practices and , communication within my relationships. It's been awhile since I seriously sat down the way did when I was receiving counseling. I stopped certain practices that was very successful in my life and I want to began again and take it to another level.

This month I'll be hosting intimate discussion on the Clubhouse App and also releasing videos into the Facebook Phatabulous Ladies page as well as going live from @phatabulousmag on Instagram. I would love for you to join me. I love games and activities so I'll do that as well as group journal assignments. If you like that sort of thing I would love for you to participate.

Style Your Curves
Savings Code: PhatMag2021

Comments

FAMU Announcer’s ‘Ozempic’ Comment Sparks Outrage- FAMU Announcer Joe Bullard vs. ASU Honey Beez

When the Mic Crosses the Line: The ASU Honey Beez, Joe Bullard, and the Fight for Respect BY Phatabulous Magazine Staff 10-5-2025 It was supposed to be another electric halftime show , the type of performance that makes HBCU culture shine. But what should’ve ended with applause and celebration turned into a moment that stunned thousands both in the stands and online. As the Alabama State University Honey Beez, a nationally recognized plus-size dance team, exited the field after their energetic performance against Florida A&M University, FAMU’s longtime band announcer Joe Bullard took the mic and made a comment that has since echoed far beyond the stadium: “The new face of Ozempic.” The remark, referencing a popular weight loss drug, drew audible gasps from the crowd. In video clips that quickly went viral, you can hear fans questioning what they just heard. What was meant to be a lighthearted halftime moment suddenly turned into a public moment of body-shaming, disrespect, and disb...

Model Spotlight Revisited: Blaise Nicole’s Timeless Confidence

Model Spotlight Revisited: Blaise Nicole’s Timeless Confidence In August 2021, Phatabulous Magazine introduced readers to the stunning Blaise Nicole—a model whose confidence, grace, and bold spirit left a lasting impression. As we take another look at her journey, it’s clear that Blaise’s impact on the plus-size modeling world continues to inspire. With a fierce presence in front of the camera and a passion for self-expression, Blaise redefined beauty standards, proving that confidence is the key to commanding any space. Her feature showcased not just her striking looks, but her dedication to self-love and body positivity—values that remain at the heart of Phatabulous Magazine. Now, we’re looking for the next model to shine in our upcoming 2025 issue! If you’re ready to tell your story, embrace your unique beauty, and take center stage, apply today for our next Model Spotlight . Selected models receive: ✨ A full interview ✨ A two-page spread in the 2025 print issue ✨ A full-page ad ✨ A...

When Jokes Cross the Line - What Cardi B's Comments Really Reveal

When Jokes Cross the Line What Cardi B's Comments Really Reveal Phatabulous Magazine Staff Growing up, I was always the fat one. There were other girls with my name, but I was always described as “the short fat one.” I hated it. I never got so used to it that I was okay with it, I just learned not to lash out every time. Most of the time, I let it go because I realized people weren’t trying to get a rise out of me. Maybe they didn’t know. Maybe they didn’t care. But the truth is, it always hurt. That’s why when Cardi B, one of the most recognizable celebrities in the world, made recent comments that many found fatphobic, it struck a nerve. While speaking with fans online about her WWE t-shirts selling out, Cardi joked: “The box sets are completely sold out, especially because you fat fks — clearly you guys are fat as fk, no Chick-fil-A for y’all.” She went on to say: “Now, knowing that my fans is fat, I can’t even make fun of fat people no more. Don’t call me fatphobic, y’all, ’cau...

Phatabulous Magazine

Search This Blog